Thursday, 21 February 2013

You do not have to justify your body to anyone. Ever.

Since becoming interested in fat acceptance and body politics, my tolerance level for body shaming bullshit, however cleverly concealed it may be, has decreased dramatically. If you're going to start shit about my body, then I'm going to start shit with you. If you think you're going to tone police me after saying something blatantly fat phobic and/or shitty then you need to sit the fuck down and shut the fuck up.

Something I have witnessed a lot in the blogging sphere is people leaving comments demanding to know why a person's body looks the way it does or why a person chooses to decorate it in a certain way. I'm here to tell you that you don't have to justify or excuse your body to anyone. Not your friends, not your family, not your lover and certainly not to strangers on the internet. You don't have to provide information about your diet, how often you exercise, whether or not you have always been fat, why your boobs look that way or anything else. Anybody who demands such information from you is not your friend and I guarantee that however you respond to their insidious questions, they will not be happy with the answer. 

If you are the kind of person who thinks that your friend or somebody blogging about fashion, needs to explain why her thighs look the way they do or how she can possibly claim that she is healthy and happy, then you're a fucking arsehole and you need to get your shit together.

Yeah, I'm angry, but y'know what? I'm through with being polite to shitty people who want to police my body.

In case you need reminding, here is a cursory list of things that you never, ever, have to justify or explain to people.........

  • Your weight
  • Your shape
  • Your hairstyle or colour
  • Your tattoos
  • Your piercings
  • Your disability(ies)
  • Your mental health
  • Your body hair or lack thereof
  • Your gender identity or how you choose to present your gender
  • Your stretch marks
  • Your spots
  • Your scars
  • Your race or ethnic background
  • Your short skirt
  • Your cleavage
  • Your small breasts
  • Your large breasts
  • Your freckles
  • Your birthmarks
  • Your make-up or lack thereof
There are probably a zillion other things to add to the list, but I'm in the middle of packing for a weekend at my inlaws so that's all I've got for now.

I'd love to tell you to respond calmly and thoughtfully to this kind of prying, but I personally favour dealing with this sort of crap by letting people know I will not stand for being made uncomfortable about my own body and that I am quite happy to fucking ruin anybody who doesn't get that.

I'm not a horrible person, but I am completely through with people who are incapable of respecting boundaries and exercising a bit of basic courtesy. If you can get your head around that, we'll get along just fine :)

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